>> Camille (6/10)

CamilleSomeone please pick my jaw up from off the floor.  I have just witnessed one of my new favorite bad movies of all time, the James Franco/Sienna Miller rom-com, Camille.  Wow.  I’ll try my darnedest not to get too spoiler-heavy (no guarantees), but let’s just say that by the time Franco climbed onto the back of a blue horse with a zombiefied Sienna Miller that took off into the air while rice rained down from the sky, i wasn’t quite sure if I had just witnessed an actual film or if someone was playing an elaborate prank on me.

The most amazing thing is that no matter how weird (very weird) the screenplay gets, the director seems completely unaware that he’s making something this strange.  Camille has slightly less artistic flash than a movie made for basic cable.  Its peppy country music soundtrack attempts to compliment its normalcy, a sweet little cute love story about two mismatched newlyweds on their way to Niagara Falls.

Except that (and excuse me if it feels like a spoiler) Sienna Miller plays a zombie.

Early in the film, Franco’s character accidentally crashes them into a tree, killing Camille (Miller).  She’s resurrected in a glow of light, then begins rotting shortly thereafter.  i know I can’t convey the tone of the film in this review, which really is a huge part of what makes Camille such a choice piece of work, but first, imagine the most banal, saccharine romantic comedy you’ve ever seen.  Make sure the soundtrack is all country music.  Then add a zombie.

Aw, screw spoilers…I know I already mentioned the finale, but another favorite scene of mine is the one in which Franco gives Miller a formaldehyde sponge bath in bed after all of her hair has fallen out.  I literally could not believe my own eyes.

This is an amazing movie, completely out of touch with how misguided and bizarre it is.  I still don’t know if it was well-intended garbage or accidental genius, but, yeah, I’ll be talking about this one for a while…I can feel it.  Camille is genuinely quirky without ever intending to be so, which makes it all the more entertaining (and not in a good way).  It’s a clumsy film–every moment of drama or humor falls flat, the romance is not believable, the dialogue is bad, the acting is inconsistent–but then, there’s Sienna Miller allowing David Carradine to dye her dead, pale skin a bright orange, then dressing up in a Dale Evans cowgirl outfit so she can dance with her husband next to a giant strawberry, and I fall in love with it.  i am still shaking my head in disbelief hours after I watched it.

6 on a 1 to 10 scale



  1. Is this a remake of the Greta Garbo CAMILLE? If so, I’ve had that dvd on my shelf unwatched for Waaayyyyyy too long.

  2. No, not a remake of that film.

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